Don’t you hate it when you meet someone you like and you have a few dates and then he just…disappears? You think it’s going great and you’re hoping he might be the one but apparently, he thinks something is missing.
What does it take to get a guy to want you in his life for more than just a few dates?
If this sounds familiar, keep reading.
Don’t Change Who You Are
Even though some of these tips might seem like you need to change who you are, you should never do that. You don’t want to be with a man who likes a version of you that is not really who you are.
When it comes down to the important things – your values and morals – keep true to yourself. If you change those things, you’re not going to be happy with the person you’re with. And you won’t be happy with yourself either.
But you can work on little things that don’t change your core values to get a guy to want you to be a more permanent part of his life. They are often little things that you already do for your friends and family.
Be Confident In Who You Are
The first thing you need to realize is that you don’t need him to like you. You need to be fine whether he likes you or not. And if you have that kind of confidence, he’ll know it.
Men run like gazelles when they smell need and desperation. If they pick up even the slightest scent of fear of being alone, they will be gone. Even worse, some men will take advantage of a woman who has no self-confidence.
So, when you go on a date with a guy, remember that you’re going to be just fine if it doesn’t work out.
Have Some Real Conversation
Everyone gets bored if all you talk about is the weather, social media, and news. Small talk will not make him want more of you.
Instead, get real right from the beginning. Ask him about the things that are important to him and talk about what matters to you. You don’t have to start off by telling him your deepest secrets but you should be able to talk about the things you’re passionate about.
When you talk about subjects that matter to you, he’ll feel comfortable talking to you about his passions. That in itself is rare and he’ll definitely want to be around you more.
Ditch The Drama
Most men don’t like drama. They like to keep life simple. Some men like excitement but they don’t like the gossip and chatter that some women like to talk about.
If you like talking like that with your girlfriends, that’s fine, but he likely doesn’t want to hear it. He’ll quickly get bored if all you talk about is your best friend’s fights with her boyfriend or how one woman in the office is always chasing after everyone else’s husbands.
Don’t Suffocate Him
A strong, independent man has his own life and doesn’t need to have you in his back pocket all the time. He doesn’t want you to check on him every five minutes and he probably doesn’t have time to text with you all day long.
If you show up at his house unannounced or make an appearance at his work without an invite, he’s going to feel like you’re stalking him. More is not always better.
Give him space to do the things he has to do.
Of course, a casual text here and there to say you were thinking about him won’t hurt. Just don’t make it constant.
Talk About Sex
Ok, talking about sex is going to arouse him to some extent. But that’s not the purpose of talking about it.
Before you get in the sheets, you should be clear about what you’re getting into. If you’re a virgin, let him know. If you have a kinky side, it’s ok to tell him. If you have triggers, you should absolutely tell him. If you have a 5-date rule, be clear about it.
The point of talking about sex isn’t to get him turned on but to make him aware of what he’s getting into. Chances are, he’ll appreciate that you’re not playing games with him.
Make Him Laugh
Men love to laugh with a woman. Laughter draws people closer. If he can laugh with you and you can laugh with him, he’ll definitely want to be with you more.
Not everyone has the same sense of humor but you can usually find a least a couple things you both think are funny. Once you learn what kind of humor he appreciates, you can watch for funny things to tell him about later. You can be on the lookout for the kinds of movies that will both have you laughing out loud.
Make Plans Without Him
Once you meet a guy you like, don’t stop making plans with your friends. If you do, he’s going to feel like you don’t have a life outside of him.
Men like it when women know they can do things on their own or with friends. Sometimes, you might want to invite him to join. If your friends want to have a girl’s night out though, and you haven’t made plans with him, don’t turn them down just because it’s Saturday night and you’re hoping he’ll ask you out.