What Is It About You That Makes A Guy Only Want To Hook Up?

hooking up

What is it that makes a guy only want to hook up with a girl? Is it something about her, or is it just him?

The truth is, it can be a little bit of both.

Why Do Men Only Want To Hook Up?

Some men just are not ready for a commitment of any kind. They are out to have a good time and for them, that means hooking up with a fun girl. Sometimes men prey on a certain kind of woman because they know that she’ll accept a simple night of fun in the hopes that it will become more.

Other times, men specifically look for women who they don’t think want more than a night or two of fun times. They seek out women who they don’t think will want a long-term relationship.

But what if it is about you? What is it about you that attracts men who are only looking for sex? Are you giving off some kind of vibes?

You might be! Here are some of the things men who are looking for a hookup might see in you.

You Don’t Speak Up

One of the most obvious things you can do to let a guy know that you’re not just looking for a hookup is to tell him! Yes, it’s okay to let a guy know that you’re not interested in just having sex. And it’s okay to ask questions!

If you’re looking for someone who will stick around for the long term, maybe even looking towards the future and getting married and having children, let him know from the beginning. If he’s only looking for sex, he’ll likely back off. But if he’s interested in the same thing as you, he might redirect his thoughts.

The worst that can happen is he will walk away and direct his attention somewhere else. That’s a good thing. Neither of you has wasted any time and you won’t have to deal with the heartache when he doesn’t call you the next day.

You Are Easily Accepting

If you accept everyone you meet and allow them into your life (and your bedroom), you’re going to get a lot of men who just want to take, take, take from you. They’ll take your time, your attention, and your devotion and they won’t give anything back.

Be pickier!

If a guy is giving off Playboy vibes, there’s a good reason for it. Does he have a reputation for being a lady’s man? If you’re not looking for only good times, tell him thanks, but no thanks. You do not need to allow every man into your life simply because he tries to get with you!

You Send Mixed Signals

Photo by Xennie Moore on Unsplash

When you’re talking to a new guy and telling him you’re looking for a serious boyfriend and not just a friend with benefits, are you dressed like a party girl? Do you tell stories about drunken nights of passion? Are you flirting with every guy in the room?

Then it doesn’t matter what you say. If your actions don’t match your words, you’re giving off mixed signals and he’s going to hear only the ones he wants to hear. In other words, he’s going to listen to the hook-up girl vibes.

You Come Across As A Party Girl

Guys who just want to hook up usually won’t waste time with a woman who they know is only looking for a serious relationship. Some of them like the challenge but they can easily be sent off by sticking to your guns.

But if you look like a party girl, talk like a party girl, and act like a party girl, they are going to think you’re a party girl.

You don’t have to dress like a librarian and put plastic barrettes in your hair in order to make him understand that you’re not just a party girl. Just tone down the drinking, focus your flirting with one person and be a woman who isn’t looking for someone to validate them.

You’re Super Independent

There’s nothing wrong with being independent but if a guy thinks you’re too independent, he might assume that you’re not interested in a committed relationship. And in his mind, if you’re not looking for something serious, you must be interested only in hooking up.

When you’re talking to a guy and you tell him that you never want to get married because you don’t need a man and brag about all the ways you can take care of yourself, he’s bound to think you’re super independent. There’s nothing wrong with that and you might still want a serious relationship. Just tone it down when you’re getting to know him.

You Lack Confidence

Men who only want hookups love women who lack confidence. They are easier to get into bed, and easier to please, and it’s so simple to make them think that they think these women are gorgeous. A little flattery can go a long way.

Confident women don’t need men to tell them how awesome they are.

You don’t have to be cocky and run around telling everyone you’re amazing. If you can’t take a compliment though and you blow off their attention, men will think that you don’t have confidence in yourself and you’ll become an easy target.

You Smell Like Desperation

Desperate women make easy targets for men who just want to have sex. These kinds of men know that a woman who is desperate to be in a relationship will jump at the chance to be with someone, even if it means having sex on a first date or the first time they meet someone.

Set your standards and don’t accept the attention of any man. Be ready to say you need more time or that you’re not looking for a one-night stand. Speak your mind and have confidence in your worth.

When you start showing that you value yourself and your time, you’ll find that a lot fewer men will be hanging around looking for a hookup!

Written by Autumn Seave

Email: inkyblueallusions@shaw.ca