Being a feminist means different things to different people. Some women won’t even call themselves feminists because of the many misconceptions around the title. But the truth is that every woman who believes in equal rights for all people is a feminist.
Some men think that feminists are man-hating women who wish that all men would just disappear. They think that feminists want to emasculate men and turn them into soft versions of themselves.
While some feminists might feel this way, most of them don’t.
Before you date a woman who says she is a feminist, here are a few things you should know.
Modern Feminism Is Inclusive
In the past, you couldn’t be a feminist if you shaved, wore makeup, or wanted to be a stay at home mom. These days, feminism is more inclusive of different kinds of women.
You can be a feminist if you wear makeup or choose not to. If you shave your legs or don’t shave, you can still be a feminist. You can be straight, lesbian, pansexual, or anywhere else on the sexuality scale and still be a feminist.
You can even be a feminist if you’re a man!
Feminists Don’t Hate Men
It’s a common misconception that all women who are feminists must hate men. They don’t. Some women don’t like most men very much but that is not because of her feminist ideals. That is more likely due to her personal experiences.
The fact is that many feminists quite like men and have loving relationships with them as friends, lovers, and husbands. They have respect for some of the men in their lives and they have good conversations with them. Being a feminist doesn’t make her a man-hater!
Feminists May Or May Not Believe In Marriage
Whether a woman wants to get married is not related to whether or not she is a feminist. There are some women who do not want to ever get married but many married women are feminists.
Feminists are just as likely to get married as women who are not feminists. Feminists don’t necessarily think that marriage is a way to trap a woman or own her. Marriage is a very personal choice.
Feminists Don’t All Look The Same
You can’t tell if a woman is a feminist by how she looks. At one time, people thought that all feminists had short hair, didn’t wear makeup, and refused to shave their legs or under their arms. This is not necessarily the case anymore.
While some feminists may have those attributes, they are just as likely to wear their hair long and wear makeup. They probably shave. Feminists may even get cosmetic surgery! They might get Botox or nose jobs or they could even have had their boobs artificially enhanced.
Just because a woman is a feminist doesn’t mean she doesn’t care how she looks. If she’s comfortable with a more natural look, she might not want to wear makeup or other image enhancing products. But she might.
Feminists Don’t Hate Sex
Some men think that feminists hate sex – especially with men. Some people even think that all feminists are lesbians.
This is simply not true. Of course, some feminists are attracted more to other women but feminists are just as likely to be heterosexual.
In fact, feminists generally do like sex quite a bit. They might like it even more because they know what they like. They are open to different kinds of fantasies and may have tried a lot of different things. They quite often believe that a woman can have as much sex as they like.
Feminists tend to be more in tune with who they are. This covers many aspects of their life, including their sex life. Some feminists are purely into vanilla sex – because that’s what they like – while others are kinky. But some feminists are dominant in bed and some who are submissive. Feminists will often know her likes and dislikes very well, which makes her a great sexual partner.
Feminists Are Open And Honest – And Expect The Same From You
One thing that can be said of most feminists is that they know who they are and they are generally pretty open and honest about it. They will tell you what they expect from you and they won’t beat around the bush.
Whether they are looking for marriage, a fuck buddy, or are just interested in dating, they will let you know.
In turn, they will likely expect the same thing from you. They aren’t interested in playing games. Men that play hard to get or try to manipulate them won’t get very far with a feminist woman.
A feminist will want to know what you are hoping for from your relationship with her. They will expect you to tell them if you’re not ready for marriage, if you only want to be with someone who is monogamous, or if you’re just looking for a casual relationship. If you don’t tell her the truth, you’re not going to get very far with her.
A Feminist Isn’t Likely Interested In Traditional Gender Roles
If you’re looking for a wife that is going to stay home and raise the children and take care of the house while you work and then go out for drinks with the boys, you likely don’t want to date a feminist. Likely.
Most feminists aren’t interested in only doing these typical gender roles. However, many feminists believe that women should have a choice and for some women, their choice is to do these kinds of things.
But even if you meet a feminist who is mostly interested in being a mom, she’s probably still going to expect you to do your share at home. That means she’s not going to want to be the only one to cook and do the dishes. She’s going to want to be involved in decisions like where to spend money and where to invest it. A feminist isn’t going to take a back seat to her life, even if she does want to be a mom who stays home and cares for the children.
Ask Her What Being A Feminist Means To Her
Ultimately, if the woman you are interested in dating is a feminist, you should have a conversation with her about what it means to be a feminist to her. Don’t assume that you know what it means.
Talk to her about why she is a feminist and how she tries to live her life. You might be surprised. Feminists are unique and women are feminists for different reasons.
